I have found through the divorce process that any individual event can be wildly differently interpreted by two different people. I have prided myself on being able to see the same thing different ways. To be able to see how it might be interpreted differently by someone else. You would think that would be helpful when you are discussing things with someone you have differences with, but not always.
What I see today is that my truth has validity. I may not be able to convince someone else to see things the way I do, but I don’t have to do that. I can take a stand, know that I am right and not accept anything less.
Not all disagreements have to result in compromise. Especially when you have no incentive to do so. You can agree to disagree. That doesn’t even need to be stated. Just end the conversation and move on.
The Enemy attacks me by feeding into my insecurities. Just because I had issues 2 years ago, years ago, and so on, doesn’t mean I have those issues now. I do try to be open to the truth, whatever it might be, but I can also take a stand for the truth as I see it and be strong in my convictions.
Back during the Clinton White House years, I heard James Carville, a consultant to the president, talk about their strategies for dealing with accusations: deny, deny, deny. That is exactly what the Clintons did, over and over, and honestly, it wasn’t ineffective. Most of what they were accused of slid right off.
It’s kind of that way when you want to assert something that isn’t true. You state it as a fact over and over to everybody who will listen. You don’t have to believe it’s true, you only have to assert that it’s true. When you do so confidently, probably most people will believe you.
That’s not how I am, and it’s not how I want to be, but my happiness depends on me knowing who I am in Christ, not what other people believe about me. Who I am in Christ is forgiven and accepted and loved. That’s something I can assert that is consistently true. It’s true about me, and it’s true about every believer. That is common ground. The rest is between God and ourselves.