I was watching a program today and a woman said ‘shyness is not one of her problems.’ That made me think. It is very true that people do not want to be shy. I think it’s harder to get a job when you are shy. I think it’s harder to get a mate. I think it’s harder to make friends. So yes, there are a lot of problems with being shy.
There hasn’t been a time when I felt I wasn’t shy, but there are times when I didn’t feel it was a liability. When I first got sober, within a year I had a lot of friends, I was comfortable in groups, and I was able to not just speak in AA meetings, but actually share.
I was able to find jobs, but there was always a mention of my shyness. It was worse than normal, as evidenced by my boss introducing himself and me at the same time we were going around the rooms with introductions. I was glad he did it.
Right now I embrace my shyness. I have even spoken up and said to people right up front that I’m socially awkward. I don’t like being shy, but I don’t have to be ashamed of it. It actually feels kind of good that I don’t have to fight to be someone I’m not.
Lots of alcoholics have social anxiety. You know, the type to drink to be comfortable in social situations. There is a percentage of time in AA spent talking about how to manage social situations where there is drinking.
I’m not alone!