Being a Present

When my daughter was in middle school, she had a knack for picking out beautiful clothing. She had a good eye, and as girls do, she wanted to look as good or better than the people she admired. It is the time when clothes become important in a young girl’s life.

Someone told her she looked like she was trying too hard. She scaled back on color, cut, design. It became less noticeable, more nondescript.

It broke my heart a little. 

I have come to see that we outwardly adorn ourselves as a gift. It is as much a gift to ourselves as it is to others. It isn’t the best of everything we need to adorn ourselves in, it’s the way in which we choose to adorn ourselves.

I have worn black for 2 years. One of the reasons I chose to is because I wanted to become invisible. I didn’t want to stick out. Obviously when you only wear black, you might stick out more than you normally would. I guess I just put that out of my mind. I’m like the kid who closes his eyes and says ‘You can’t see me!’

Perhaps it’s a bit like this:

I’m starting to notice a lot of things. I notice that women dress for their husbands and for themselves. I don’t have to be mediocre. I might not be the best dresser in the world, but I don’t have to be the worst. Adorning myself makes me feel better. Being creative and adding color and texture to life is a gift you can give yourself every morning and every evening. It’s a way to love yourself.

Granted, I have a long way to go, but isn’t it a gift I can give my daughter to give myself the joy of improving the outside as well as the inside?


Being a Present

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